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Wednesday, July 19, 2017

The Quest for Truth

My brain runs and runs, borderline manic. In this summer season, my energy is moving so hot and fast, I can't fall asleep at night. My thoughts fly far and wide.

I follow paths of reason and logic, but to what end? I feel this drive to discover some absolute truth, though all logic would assure me of the futility of this action. How will I ever understand life, death, reality, the universe, or how to achieve the perfect balance of cream and sugar in my coffee?

Francis Bacon moved modern thinkers into the place of combining mysticism and science, the idea that truth can be discovered through reason and logic using scientific principles. Esoteric orders developed champion the cause of science, and that spirit is ever pervasive. Today we are all living under this religious delusion.

No, I'm not anti-science. I just realize that we are all laboring like slaves for the force of "progress."

All questions about the universe can be answered. We can know them through science. We should know them.

Are these statements true? How can we know they are true?

Two days ago, I had a chat with Venus Satanas of For those of you who are unfamiliar with her work, she is a founding voice of Independent Satanism.

I approached our conversation from a rationalist perspective, thinking that her experience might give me grand insights into piecing together this puzzle and forming a better paradigm. She quickly reminded me that satanism was spiritual. Her words were much needed for me. Again I had to remind myself to actively shut down my racing mind.

I need the peace of the spiritual. I believe the world needs it as well. Scientific progress is natural, and I do not speak against it. On the other hand, we have inherited a very Greek philosophical tradition that keeps us in the logical and rational, believing it is superior.

Are we of the industrialized world so much better than Australian aborigines? What is our standard? What is the point?

It has been suggested that creativity is the goal of life, that there is a purpose in nature. If creativity is the goal, then we have to way progress against that. Diversity is to be cherished. Destruction in the name of progress is abhorred.

I believe the Spirit of Satan is revealed in the spiritual. It is a mind I wish to cultivate and will be mindful to do so.

I worship the Devil.

Monday, July 17, 2017

Adapting Hell

Recently, a anonymous xian messaged me on my tumblr regarding my eternal fate. I'll post it here, so you can read it in it's full glory:

I know this tumblr site seems appealing and that it may make you feel good, but it’s temporary.  Do you know the pain and suffering you may endure for eternity if you do not turn away from sin and from Satan, his demons/spirits, and dark/evil ways?  It will be FOREVER & for ETERNITY (Just think about that for a while - It will be NEVER ending pain and suffering)!  You may think going to Hell will provide you with lasting pleasure, but open your EYES now while you still can.  There will be NO pleasure in Hell.  The Devil and his Demons are fooling you right now.  They want you to think it’s going to be pleasurable and one big orgy in Hell, but they are tricking you to choose Hell with deceit, lust and pleasures of the flesh!!!  I know, I’ve experienced it too.  I’ve even been duped into believing Satan’s lies too through this site and his lust and perversions.  But, I stop and think of how I’d want to spend eternity after I die and it is NOT in pain, suffering and agony, it is with love and peace in Heaven with your true Lord, Jesus.  Does this make you mad or even rage with anger that I’m typing this message to you?  Well, that’s because the evil that you’ve invited into your life wants you to feel that way, it’s making you feel that way because it wants to keep you on the path of destruction.  I should not be visiting this site, because the temptations are so strong, but I feel God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are prompting me to reach out to you while you still have the chance to save your immortal soul, while you still have the chance to save yourself from eternal damnation!  Turn away from Satan and his evil ways!!!  It won’t be easy, but take that step now, don’t wait.  In Jesus’s Holy name I command the evil one, Satan and demons to release their grip on your and to go back to Hell where they belong!

Forgive my subjecting you to that mess. Here is a well-meaning xian at work tormenting me with his own personal hell. For this reason, I have decided to re-visit the topic, though I have already written much on this in the past.

It occurs to me that life is highly adaptive. It is a great power that allows species to survive. As humans, we sometimes find other peoples living in situations that are hard to imagine.  How can people choose to live at the base of an active volcano? Perhaps at some point it was dormant and they felt safe, then managed to calm themselves when the rumblings occurred. Or they invented stories and gods. Their leaders found clever ways to soothe the fears. When Tambora erupted in 1815, I imagine a very sudden and heartfelt realization came over the people as the entire population of the island was wiped out.

I wonder how the Japanese can live with their god-awful power lines. They are the only industrialized nation on earth that doesn't bury them. They are hideous, and hang overhead darkening the sky. Yet, the people are blind to them. They just get used to them until an earthquake happens and the live-wires litter the streets.

We learn to live with political corruption, pollution, and crime. We give freedom and authority away like sheep. This is the down-side to adaptability.

And so it is with hell. This idea, this curse, has been a plague on the earth for far too long. I will quickly list some of the big reasons to reject the concept of hell...

It was not expressed or even eluded to in the Old Testament.

A truly loving and omnipotent god would not send his creation to a place of eternal conscious torment.

The word "hell" does not appear in the original New Testament. It is a pagan concept. Many of the "hell texts" are very poorly translated into English to support the doctrine.

Dear xian, take a moment and realize: would a loving god, a god of grace, a god of light really try to draw his creation unto him by threat? Does god really want to exist in eternity with torment souls crying to him for help, the souls of his own children? Does this make sense?

Keep your hell to yourself. I reject it. My name is Carmilla Ravencraft and my favorite words are

"Satan is Lord"

Monday, July 10, 2017

Morphic Resonance and Icons

Recently, I have received several messages from people who tell me they don't believe in Satan, yet find themselves drawn to my tumblr and are unable to resist its allure. Something about the images compels them to come back again and again. They message me and ask me why this is, so I am writing to elude to an answer. (I say "elude" because it is no easy thing to understand the mind.)

First of all, it is important to understand that we are much more than we often consider ourselves to be. Our tendency, especially in modern life, is to form our identity based upon our beliefs and decisions. We see ourselves as what we do and how we vote. While our choice of MP3's might hint at our greater psyche, we are still more than what we listen to and how we dress.

The psyche is vast and complex, a matrix of experiences and memories forgotten, desires unrevealed and relationships undiscovered. We live lives we don't want, believe things we don't believe in, and do things our inner-selves abhor. Very few ever come close to knowing themselves.

To make the problem of understanding our psyche even greater, we are not islands of consciousness. We are a part of a matrix of relationships, holons of consciousness that expand into infinity.

Morphic resonance is a theory that speaks to the inherent creative power of nature. Evolution is not merely natural selection and random mutation, but a complex and powerful force that has a consciousness of its own. Memories are not stored in our brain but in energy fields that continue to shape our world. We inherit from our past, powerful experiences that we will pass on to future generations.

Iconic images speak powerfully to us. I cannot stand to see rats, even on TV. Children who have never seen bears may dream of being chased by one. Why are swords so cool? They still have such appeal. Is it because they meant life or death for thousands of years? We inherit memory. We inherit the past. The terrors of our ancestors, the great adventures, the whole of human experience resonates on planet earth and through time.

Donald Hoffman believes that evolution makes iconic images all the more powerful because natural selection is making us blind. A belief in morphic resonance does not exclude the impact of natural selection. It's a thing. What has Hoffman discovered about the impact of fitness vs. seeing reality?

Computer simulations show that species that demonstrate fitness, the ability to tend to its own needs, survives. In contrast, species that are adept at seeing reality perish. Take a moment to digest this.

Our brains have evolved to process sensory input. Why don't we see more of what is around us? Technically speaking, we are almost blind, seeing only a narrow scope of reality. Hoffman suggest that our minds have evolved to view reality as icons, not unlike the icons on your computer desktop. We can click them, move them, activate programs, but we don't spend time reading the whole computer script for the program. If we had to deal in pure code, we would be bogged down and unable to use computers efficiently.

As humans move forward in time, we are adapted to survival and that means we have limited resources for experiencing reality. We are living the tip of the tip of the iceberg.

Anton LaVey decreed that lack of aesthetic was a sin. He rightly understood that we are products of our environment. It reminds me of interesting studies involving crime reduction in communities. Authorities used aesthetics. Places that look safe and clean are seldom used in violent crimes. A neighborhood that appears unsafe is exactly that.

While xians are taught to shun idols, satanists use them. We use them to construct our reality. This is powerful. While one might thing that xians, shunning their idols might actually put their time to good use feeding the poor or tending to the sick, that rarely happens. But again, I digress. It's always hard to resist taking shots at the sheep.

Icons speak to us on many levels. Beyond the conscious paradigm we construct for ourselves. these archetypes touch our hearts. They move us. They resonate with us and our history. The connect us to a greater consciousness.

Confused yet?

I am Carmilla Ravencraft, and I fuck the Devil.

Monday, July 3, 2017

All is Revealed

I heard X-Men Apocalypse was a flawed movie, so I took my time seeing it. Rather than feeling disappointed, I had a powerful spiritual experience watching it.

Since the film was full of symbolism, I was interested to read what people were writing about it from a metaphysical perspective, but was terribly disappointed by what I read. The internet is flooded by xian watch-dog nonsense, the worst intellectual tripe, leading me to conclude that xians should never write on symbolism and spiritual matters. For them, they have only to find one perceived heresy and all meaning is lost. The movie is chalked up to Satanic, the work of the Illuminati. And it seems they are very good at finding 666 disguised in just about everything. It makes one wonder if artists don't throw in the numbers just for fun.

Browsing sites discussing the spiritual meaning, I was unable to find anything insightful regarding the movie, so I decided to post my own synopsis of the films more interesting aspects. I bet you'll learn a thing or two reading this so pay attention.

First of all, Apocalypse has it's root in the Book of Revelation. In fact, the title of Revelation is Apocalypse in Greek. So "Apocalypse" does not mean "the end of the world," at least not originally.

In the film, when the character En Sabah Nur (Apocalypse) says "ALL IS REVEALED," he is in essence speaking to the heart of the movie, the revelation of things to come. Obviously, the Phoenix is that revelation.

It's kind of sickening on an intellectual level that all the stuff I read on the movie failed to address just these basic points. It only takes a google search to get most of this stuff, including the meaning of Phoenix.

Apocalypse is the revelation of things to come and the future is Phoenix. So what does that mean?

The concept of the bird can be traced back to ancient Egypt (like the character En Sabah Nur), the concept of death and rebirth. It is interesting that the phoenix is also important to most ancient religions including xianity and even appears in Shakespeare.

The "chol" of Jewish folklore is also found in the bible, a phoenix bird. Is it coincidence that "chol" also means "sand" and can mean "multitude of people?" En Sabah's demonstrated the power to manipulate sand and was seeking the power to manipulate the entire population of earth.

Okay, so there are a few terms, but what does the whole thing mean?

Xians who analysed the movie believe En Sabah Nur is Satan. From his own mouth, he proclaims that he has been called many names, including "Elohim." I doubt the writer of the script would go so far as to say "Jehovah," but I think that it was implied. En Sabah Nur represents all the gods, all worship to all deities throughout history. This would include Set, the Devil, Satan, and Lucifer.


Yes, so this individual entity represents both sides of the coin. The full duality. Dark and Light.

(Having said that, the Old Testament Jehovah makes a pretty poor example of Light...)

So back to Phoenix. She is the absolute and total destruction of the old. In the movie, that meant the destruction of all things worshiped, all the gods of man. From the ashes comes a new era, a new age. Despite the dark themes in the movie, it is ultimately a message of hope. Will the new age be better? The fact that Phoenix is a woman, the divine feminine is a good indicator that it will be. Instead of male dominated aggression, there will be a time of nurturing.

As I watched the movie, the scene with the Phoenix transformation really took ahold of me. I became aware that I was breathing hard and clutching myself. I knew I was connecting to something that was wanting to manifest within me.

It's interesting that Charles said: "Save me."

His prayer was to Jean, not to Jesus.

No fear.

No fear.

Tuesday, June 20, 2017


Behold the face of your God. Behold the face of Satan.

It's as good as any, I suppose.

Here is Domitian (Titus Flavius Caesar Domitianus Augustus) who ruled Rome from CE 81 to 96. Why is he significant? Because this monomaniacal vainglorious bastard is the final incarnation of Satan given in the biblical texts.

I have written much about my journey as a satanist, my spiritual journey since my departure from xianity. It has been interesting. The intellectual struggle vexed me to the extreme, trying to come up with some honest root to the idea of Satan. Where can we find him? Satan seems to be birthed from the bible, the very name coming from the Hebrew for enemy. However, as I have already written, from the book of Job to the Prophets to the Gospels to the Epistles to Revelation, we get a shifting image of this being known as Satan.

Satan goes from seeming like one god in a pantheon before monotheism took over Israel in the cult of David to being the spirit of the enemies of Israel. In the Gospels, he is the rebellious spirit within the Jews. Paul expands upon the spiritual dimension but also strangely seems to suggest once again that Satan works with God and not against him.

And then there is Revelation.

Reading Shakepeare's Messiah by Joseph Atwill gave me the final piece of the puzzle. Revelation was written by the Cult of Domitian to show Domitian's ascendancy over his brother Titus and father Vespasian. In Revelation, Domitian is the Messiah. He is also Satan. He is the Alpha and the Omega.

For a detailed analysis of the text, read the book for yourself.

The final revelation for me is this: there is no clear Satan to be gleaned from the bible. As with all things in life, with all spiritual journeys, we must continue to live in the tension of the mystery. What did the ancients know that we didn't? I believe there are hidden mysteries in the past, particularly pertaining to the extinction of an ancient civilization, but nowhere, not in ancient Israel, Sumeria, Egypt, are we going to find one text that will paint a distinct picture of one entity we call Satan.

It is left for us to decide about this "dark force" that LaVey wrote about. We may believe or not. We may partake or abstain. We may enter into communion or shy away.

I am deeply enmeshed in it. It has consumed me. I no longer act with the illusion of freewill, being some singular entity removed from the energy web of this world and others. I have invested myself in Satan and am thus changed. I know I am a part of it.

But what is that "it?"

So here I am, living in the tension of the mystery.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

A Good Butt Fuck

I was at a party recently and the topic of anal sex came up. Though the conversation was lively, it quickly became apparent that no one really knew anything about anal sex, at least not from a metaphysical perspective. So you've probably browsed some sites talking about the do's and don'ts of ass-fucking, hygiene, and technique, but Carmilla will give you some insights that will set your hair on fire.

To understand how anal sex is unique, let's contrast it to "straight sex." Let's imagine a man and a woman (we'll get to man on man later) in missionary position. With the man inside the woman, they are connected in a powerful circuit. Their chakras are aligned up the central channel and if they kiss, they are increasing connectivity. The man is feeding the woman his hot male sexual energy and the woman is giving him her nurturing sexual energy. They are transmuting each other's energy and sending it back. It is a complex matrix of energetic activity.

Even in cowgirl or doggy, this connection continues. Each position has different energetic nuances, but ultimately, the two lovers are exchanging on a massive level.

The ancients of the orient call the anus "the one way river." Energy flows in one direction there. You may have heard the term "anal retentive" or "tight ass." This refers to the tendency for negativity to collect in the anal area. Fears and deep lusts pool there. This makes it a very hot sexual zone.

When a man is inside a woman, he is shooting his energy into a very special place. When a man does the same to another man, it is even more intense. The penis will be receiving that "anal energy," all those deep dark emotions, a very intense experience to say the least. The recipient of the male lingam will be pierced to the core in a very submissive way. The root is interrupted by this flood of energy which affects the whole energy system.

Men pour their energy into the prostate, which is the sexual brain. Heating this point intensely pleasurable but will likely cause overheating. This can be a vicious cycle, as the male sheds his seed and energy, wishing to replenish it with more energy. Taking more energy from another male into the prostate will only invoke more ejaculations and a further loss of energy. The need will grow and grow. The fevered state of lust is often expressed in satanic and homoerotic images.

Women will have mixed results from anal sex. Great pleasure can be achieved if she is properly stimulated and prepared for the experience. This form of sex can be deeply spiritual and play on many of the woman's deepest lusts, often fulfilling the desire to submit. All resistance is lost in this very physical representation of total domination. And it can be intensely intimate.

In my experience, many guys are so eager to get their dicks in an ass that they fail to appreciate the anus as a very sensitive erogenous zone. It doesn't take fast friction from a 9 inch cock to bring pleasure. Light touching and gentle massage are immensely pleasurable. Personally, I would often prefer light fingerplay than full anal intercourse. But that's just me.

In closing, as the root chakra is often associated with the earth and with Satan, anal intercourse is rightfully associated with Satan. In ritual, it can be a powerful component, a show of total submission to a greater authority.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Seasonal Satanism

I created a tumblr account for the purpose of bringing people to this blog. So far, it has been moderately successful, although, I would love to see more traffic here.

Another motivation for having a satanic tumblr was my personal frustration over satanic porn sites. I found that clicking on a satanic tumblr meant seeing just another porn site with sexual images that seemed to have nothing to do with Satan. There was nothing overtly dark or ritualistic about it. Then there were the cheesy sites with the make-up and nuns that really wasn't my thing either.

I try to keep a variety of erotic and pornographic images on my tumblr, but I also am mindful to keep it satanic. That's the point. Of late, I have realized there have been fewer blatantly satanic images appearing on my tumblr because they aren't appearing in my feed. In short, satanic tumblrs are vanishing or inactive. Nearly all the satanic bloggers I was networking with are gone.

This happens in the spring when the weather turns. The energy of life explodes and that darkness that comes in the fall wanes. I've seen it before. It is a seasonal cycle. In the fall, satanism will rebound. It happens.

There are other factors at play. I have been networking with a number of other professing satanists through other sites and it has been very enlightening.

Most of them are xians who were repressing their shadow due to religious upbringing. Satanism gave them a chance to explore their repressed sexuality, often involving homoerotic behavior. At some point, after giving their shadow a chance to breathe, that need deflated and guilt came back into play.

Or they just move on. And I'm not judging that. There is no "unholier than thou" attitude in this. Just observations.

So why am I still practicing satanism? I like it. It works for me. It's not just a fetish. My shadow seems to be infinitely deep. Even now as the summer solstice nears and light is peaking, I still love darkness and find delight in satanic ritual.

Satanic ritual is one of the greatest things in my life. I find it suits my psyche well and will continue to indulge for the foreseeable future.

Because I worship Devil.